I opened up the cabinet to grab my can of soup. Nothing beats a can of beef soup on a warm winter day. What? How could I enjoy a can of beef soup, it must be a bowl of beef soup. I opened up the cabinet to grab my bowl of soup. Nothing beats a bowl of beef soup on a warm winter day. I put the soup in the microwave to heat it up. It does not work, the microwave cord has been chewed, must have been the beef. I put the can outside for 2 years until it was boiling. My bowl of beef soup was now ice hot. Now all I need is a spork, so I opened up the cabinet to grab my can of soup. Nothing beats a can of spork soup on a scorching winter day. I opened the can and pulled out a spork. I tried to eat it and broke my teeth. Luckily my dentist girlfriend was over for our 2 year anniversary and she fixed me right up. I pulled out another spork and it said “for chicken soup only”. I threw out the can, then I opened up the cabinet to grab my can of soup. Nothing beats a can of spork soup intended for beef soup on a scorching winter day. I opened the can and pulled out a spork. I tried to eat it and broke my teeth. Unluckily my dentist girlfriend just left me and took the kids. I cried. Worst part is after chewing through the microwave cable again, the beef, which I probably should have prepared, mooed at me and walked out of my house. I need to take my ADHD medication.